Due Date

Ethan: Where's your dad? 
Peter: Uh... no idea. 
Ethan: When's the last time you saw him? 
Peter: 1977. He had his bags packed at the door and he picked them up and put in the back of his car. And, uh, drove away. Last time I ever saw him. 
Ethan: That's so funny! My dad would never do that, he loved me! 

Peter: If I miss the birth of my own child, I'm gonna choke you out with your own scarf. Wrap that thing 'round your head, and choke you out. 
Ethan: Sounds a bit... drastic. 

Ethan: Dad... You were like a father to me. 

Ethan: My father always had a saying "When a day starts like this it's all uphill from here". 
Peter: Uphill? No, it's all downhill from here. 
Ethan: But nobody wants to be down, everybody wants to be up. It's all uphill from here. 
Peter: But it's easier to go downhill. So your dad had no idea what the fuck he was talking about. 

Ethan: Did you call me over here to apologize? 
Peter: What? Fuck You! 

Peter: I despise who you are on a cellular level. 
Ethan: Okay, I've heard that before and I'm trying to work on it. 

Ethan: My father loved coffee, and now we loved him as coffee. 

Peter: Okay, it's the Super Bowl. You're a coach with a spotty career. You are down 31-0 at halftime and you need to motivate your team. 
Ethan: That wouldn't work in a movie. 
Peter: You kidding me? It's in a movie every two years. 
Ethan: Come on guys! You, Allan, you're playing like a girl out there. What are you, a girl or something? You, Smith, what are you, a girl or something? 

Peter: What is your real name? 
Ethan: Ethan Chase, but it doesn't sound like an actor's name. 
Peter: Ethan Chase sounds like the name of an actor. Ethan Tremblay doesn't make any goddamn sense. Okay? It's confusing. It sounds like it was made up... 
Ethan: Yeah. I made it up. 
Peter: Ethan, I *know* you made it up. It's your fucking stage name! Why did you have my wife wire money to your stage name...? 
Ethan: I wasn't thinking! 
Peter: Right. 
Ethan: I'm just trying to commit to the new name..

Peter: You are a colonel in my platoon and you promised to get me home to my high school sweetheart. 
Ethan: I'm sorry. I puked into the wound. 
Peter: That's okay. 
Ethan: Get in the back, private. What are you, a girl or something? 

La película que Una de las películas que más me ha hecho reír en años. Robert, por favor, dame una razón para dejar de amarte tanto.